I'm in class right now I swear to God I feel like ripping my hair out. This is pretty much the most boring class ever. I'm not interested in the history of music. I like music the way it is I don't need to know about woodwinds and the Baroque Period.
UGH
I apologize for getting all personal yesterday but I felt like I had no one to turn to and I felt like if I got personal, then maybe someone out there in my blog world will relate and understand and I was right. Maybe I should get more personal, more often. I don't want anyone to ever feel like they have no one to turn to because theres no one who will understand because trust me, I do. Name a life experience, I've dealt with it whether it be with my own life, boyfriends life, friends life etc.
I've been feeling really out of it lately. Every now and then I get into these self doubting moods where I feel like I have to analyze everything about myself and fix it so here goes.
Goal number 1: Operation Get my life back
I think I neglect myself too much in every aspect of my life so I have to work on it. I used to be so determined. All I wanted in life is to become famous. I don't know what happened to that dream but it disappeared and I want it back.
Goal number 2: Operation find the milli to my vanilli
I have no friends in this school because I've relied on his friendship. That was my first mistake. He is my best friend but he isn't my best friend all the time and thats what I need, a best friend all the time. Since I'm a transfer student I was placed in a hotel to live which is cool, I love living here, but it's away from campus and I know if I lived on campus I'd have the oppurtunity to make tons more friends instead of the drunk transfer students that live in the hotel. The only friend that I have that I feel like i can be 100% honest with lives about an hour away from me so its tough because we talk everything but I know you ladies can attest to the fact that there's nothing like a day out shopping or just chillin with your best girl friend.
Goal number 3: Work on my damn self
This one is pretty simple. I want to work on myself more. As in making exercising a habit, making sure I have amazing grades in school, getting a job to support my shopping addiction and last but not least...dun..dun...duuunn...learning how to drive. Yes I know I know, i'm 20 years old with a permit. My friend used to give me lessons but well...thats a long story so I'm pretty much stuck because I know what I'm doing but I have no one to practice with me. I've had to cancel my road test twice already. I'm gonna have to pay for driving school once I find a job but I'm willing to do whatever it takes. I want to take care of myself.
New Motto = Me FIRST, you SECOND
So now that you ladies know some of my goals, fill me in on some of yours? What do you feel you need to accomplish to become happier with yourself?
Oh and btw I need hellllpp. Okay so I'm currently a blonde...a pharmacy blonde and it's cool and all. I used to love it but now it seems like it's taking a toll on my hair. Its become such a hassle having to dye my dark ass roots every 3 weeks and my hair just doesn't look or feel healthy anymore so I was thinking, although I'll miss my Barbie blonde hair, the health of my hair is important...how many of you feel like I should go dark? I was thinking maybe dark brown with some red lowlights or dark brown with some peekaboo highlights or maybe just adding some lowlights to this blonde hair of mine. PiinkCupcakes help me out girl I know you're a cosmetologist lol.
Here are some pics I got off google
I typed in red lowlights and I got this. It seems like she has blonde and red in her hair but i'm not sure. It's cute though
I'm really liking this look. This is what came up when I typed in peekaboo highlights.
This is just the typical brown and blonde hair.
Tell me what you think and if you have any suggestions please feel free to let me know I'm down for anything.
In my next entry I'll show you how to turn your plain white E.L.F makeup brush into a gorgeous pink one =D
AND
I'll give step by step instructions of how to make chocolate covered strawberries to spoil yourself with.
Tell me what you think and if you have any suggestions please feel free to let me know I'm down for anything.
In my next entry I'll show you how to turn your plain white E.L.F makeup brush into a gorgeous pink one =D
AND
I'll give step by step instructions of how to make chocolate covered strawberries to spoil yourself with.
Love you Amazing Ladies. I hope you're all having an amazing day.
I totally know how you feel.
ReplyDeleteThe whole not knowing who to talk to thing.
Seems like when you need someone the most, they aren't there ... yet you're always there for them.
I say go Dark Brown!! I died my hair jet black & loved it. Also been a little red head.
Can't wait until the next 2 entries!
I looooove chocolate covered strawberries.
alot of time men take away from what our main priorities are..we try so hard to make them happy n the meantime we neglect ourselves..ive also learned to do me..and do whats best for me..its a process but we grow and learn..
ReplyDeleteand i love the peak a boo highlites..those are bomb!
Stay positive girl!! Put yourself first always! Ive learned that you cant depend on even your "best" friends at times. Keep your chin up! Time is the best healer! :)
ReplyDeleteits nice to get your goals in writing! it makes them seem more do-able. like ur writing an appointment for yourself lol. one of my goals is the same as yours, to exercise regularly. i have 3 kids and am in pretty damn good shape if i may say so myself lol, BUT i want it to STAY that way. i dont want to lose weight, i just want to tighten things up and maintain it.
ReplyDeletealso as far as the hair color, i think u should try darker and it will look great (and give your hair a break! lol) do something like dark brown with burgandy in it, i think that would be hot :)
yes bloggings great for getting out how u feel... if nobodies there to listen.. we areeee =]
ReplyDeletemy goals:
-to get unlazy lol asap.. i always put everything off til the last minute..
-take my state board test so i can finally get my cosmetology license..
-get a job
-deal w my self confidence issues
andddd.. i'm sure i have ALOT more.. too many to fit in this lil comment box lol..
but onto your hair...
i really like the first pic alot.. the cut and everything..
i like dark haired ladiiz so i say yes to u going dark lol
i'm gonna get myself some blonde clip in tracks so i can have some peak a boo highlights.. so much easier to take care of.. no worries on touchin up those roots or damaging your hair
yesssss chocolate covered strawberries and pink brushes!!
Me FIRST, you SECOND - I love this motto stick with it!!!!
ReplyDeleteI know I'm only like 15, and your 20, but I'ma give you advice anyway XD
Well some of my goals are to either be a writer/editor of a fashion magazine or to be a fashion (clothes) designer. A lot of people have told I could never do the fashion designer thing because I'm too thick, and I'm thinking how does that affect me designing clothes? But still it's a downer, because sometimes it's my own family is telling me that, and I know that's not right.
I understand what you mean about operation 2 and 3. My freshman year of high school I had soo many friends that I couldn't even keep count. Literally. However this year, they all pretty much went away. I don't even know what happened. I just distanced myself from everyone. Nothing happened, it just happened, i don't know naturally. There was this one person I could always go to, but now I don't even know where she is now =[
I need to make exercising a habit. And it's not even my whole body I have to work on, just my stomach really, and maybe my arms =].
I think I need to stop doubting myself too. And I need to start believing in myself. I rely on my boyfriend (of 8 months) way to much to be my boyfriend, and best friend. I know I shouldn't do that. So believe me your not alone.
I think you should get the peek-a-boo highlights they look cute, but also natural. I also can't wait until the chocolate covered strawberry blog.
I'm sorry if I wrote (well typed really) too much. I just like helping people in need. Even if my "ranting on" doesn't help. =]
New Motto = Me FIRST, you SECOND
ReplyDeleteThats a very good motto mama.
I gotta start using that as well <3